In these moments....

I had a weak moment yesterday.

I feel as though I'm having a lot of them lately.

And in these moments I am tempted by the sweet serenade of ED. Strumming along to my heart's desires. Telling me beautiful lies.

And in these moments I lick my lips in anticipation of the taste of ED. Oh, how I miss the painful bliss of of disease.

But then the angel on my shoulder rescues me. Reminds me that I am being pulled back over the edge by a love so strong, so mighty. A love worth fighting for. Worth living for.

And so I weep away the memories of ED. I long for the powerful feeling of starvation, dedication, servitude. I long for a self hatred so strong.

But the plate's been taken away from me and there is no going back.